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 El Grandes Zan

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PostSubject: El Grandes Zan   Sun 04 Oct 2009, 4:44 am

Name: Ventisca de mil inviernos

It is a pure white ice phoenix

Release Command: "Unleash the Blizzard of a thousand winters!"

Family: Ice/Snow

Level: Bankai

Sealed Description:

Shikai Description:

Bankai Description:

Bankai Appearance:

Bankai Sword Appearance:

Shikai Ability: If the sword pierces the opponents flesh. it freezes the wound and causes major frostbite.

Bankai Ability: The armor is unmeltable, but can be broken with a very powerful blow. Also the Phoenix that manifests his sword is released and is strong enough to carry two men. and can fire ice shards from its wings.

Inner World: This world is basically a deep forest, trees everywhere. but there are certain points such as a giant boulder and a oasis, and a battle arena. it is easy to get lost in it though. But El is able to navigate through it easily. He comes here from time to time to try and master his hollow or have some arguments with it.

Zanpakutō Spirit Persona: Very gentle and kind when it comes to normal life. and it likes to comfort its master. But when it comes to battle its screeching can cause enemies to be stunned. and it is very protective over El.


Name:Ice Hurricane
Description: A small hurricane wipes through containing shards of ice that rips up the enemy
Duration/Cooldown: Range is forty yards, cooldown is five posts
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PostSubject: Re: El Grandes Zan   Fri 09 Oct 2009, 3:55 am

First off, the name is supposed to be in Japanese and English.

Second off, you shall not have Bankai.

Third, ALL of your blade's forms need a description AND picture, or, only a description. You only have a picture for each one, fix that.

Your Shikai ability needs to be WAY more descriptive, add 200 more words.

The Zanpaktou's persona doesn't have 50 words, it has less than that. Due to this, increase the size.

That one technique needs a usage limit. Also, describe it more, add WAY more words.

All and all, denied.
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